There is much hesitancy on my part to mention some negative traits that Ben exhibits. I am not sure if these behaviors are typical of all Asperger people; I just know these traits I am going to mention are real and problematic both to Ben and the entire family. Part of these behaviors may be due to his ongoing battle with depression.

At age twenty, Ben still must be told to take a shower, put on deodorant, and put on clean clothes everyday. Somewhere in the literature I think I read that he is about four years behind in maturity; so we keep hoping his behavior will catch up at some point.

Ben is very stubborn. If his mind is made up about some subject, there is little hope of changing it. This problem was reflected in school especially if he did not see the necessity to do some homework assignment that seemed pointless to him. He caught on immediately if he thought some teacher was giving him “busy work” which he already knew how to do.

It is very easy for Ben to lie to us. We have discovered these lies are about things which he does not want to do. For example, we might say, “Ben, have you brushed your teeth?” He will automatically say, “Yes” when we know he has not done it. And he is like many children in that he will lie if he thinks the truth will get him into trouble. Many times a quick answer of “Yes” is to get us to hush and leave him alone which is what he prefers.

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Filed under: Asperger Syndrome

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